How to Support a Friend or Family Member Who's Going Through Surrogacy

Close friends touching hands

Becoming a surrogate mother is a big decision that comes with many emotional ups and downs. It's natural for friends and family members to want to support their loved ones during this time, but it's not always easy to know how to best do that.

If you know someone is going through surrogacy, you may be wondering how you can best support them. Here are some tips on how to provide comfort and support during this time.

Educate Yourself About the Surrogacy Process

One of the best ways to support your loved one is by educating yourself about gestational surrogacy. This way, you can be there for them every step of the way, understanding what they're going through and how they feel.

Taking the time to learn about surrogacy shows you care about and support your loved one's decision. It also allows you to provide your friend or family member with much-needed emotional support during a challenging and confusing time.

You can start by talking to your loved one about their decision and why they chose to become a surrogate. You can also contact a reputable surrogacy agency like Vermont Surrogacy Network for more information. You can also read articles, books, or online forums about other people's experiences with surrogacy.

Surrogacy is a unique and incredible journey, and being supportive and understanding can help make it a positive experience for your loved one.

Respect Their Decision to Become a Surrogate

Becoming a surrogate is a personal decision that's not made lightly, and respecting your friend or family member's choice is essential. This isn't always easy, especially if you have concerns about the potential risks involved.

It's okay to voice your concerns and to have an open and honest discussion about why your loved one has chosen to become a surrogate. If you can't support their decision, it may be best to take a step back from the situation. However, it's also important to remember that disagreeing with their decision doesn't mean you don't love or support them.

It's a big decision that comes with a lot of emotions. And yet, despite the emotional weight of the decision, many women choose to become surrogates.

If your friend or a family member has decided to become a gestational surrogate, respect their decision, even if you don't necessarily agree with them. They know what they're doing and have thought long and hard about it. Trust they have made the right decision for themselves, and help them as they move forward.

Offer to Help Throughout Their Surrogacy Experience

The surrogate motherhood journey can be exhausting, both physically and emotionally. Your friend or family member must take care of herself physically and emotionally. This means eating a healthy diet, getting plenty of rest, and exercising regularly. It's also essential for her to find time to relax and de-stress.

Helping with everyday chores and errands like grocery shopping and making meals can make such a big difference and take a lot of pressure off someone already dealing with so much. It will allow your friend or family member to focus on their mental health and having a healthy pregnancy.

For the person offering support, it's an opportunity to play a more active role in their surrogacy and deepen their relationship. It's also a beautiful way to show how much you care.


It's natural for a surrogate mother to feel a wide range of emotions. You can offer your support by listening to her and being there for her during this time. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is simply be there for your loved one.

Surrogate motherhood can be a very emotional experience. Your friend or family member may feel excited and thrilled one minute and anxious and scared the next. This emotional roller coaster is normal. Be there through the ups and downs and let her know it's okay to feel whatever she's feeling.

Your friend or family member may need to talk about their feelings. Tell them you're available if they ever need to talk, even if it's in the middle of the night. She may also need some time to process everything on her own. It's important to respect her needs and give her the space to talk or not talk as she needs.

Surrogate mothers often say how much they appreciate the support of their friends and family members during this time. If you're unsure what to say, simply let them know you love and support them.

Offer Words of Encouragement

Surrogacy can be a long and challenging process. A kind word of encouragement at the right time can make a difficult moment for a surrogate mother easier. For many surrogate mothers, it's essential to successfully navigate the surrogacy process.

Surrogacy will forever change the lives of those involved. It involves a personal relationship between the surrogate mother and the family who has chosen her to carry their child. A surrogate mother may not always have someone in their life who understands exactly what they are going through. This is why words of encouragement from family and friends are so important.

You can offer words of encouragement in many ways. You can text or email to let her know you're thinking of them. You can write a letter expressing your support for her decision to become a surrogate. You can also take some time out of your day to call her and catch up.

No matter how you choose to offer your support, remember that your words of encouragement will mean the world to your loved one during this surrogacy journey. Knowing someone cares can make all the difference. For many, this support is essential to moving through the surrogacy process.

Celebrate Moments During Their Surrogacy Journey

Surrogacy is an incredible gift that brings joy and happiness to many individuals and couples. There are many milestones within the process. From the initial decision to become a surrogate mother to feeling the baby kick the first time to when she meets the baby, she has carried for another family.

Pregnancy milestones should be celebrated, both big and small. Celebrating these milestones together will help your loved one feel supported and appreciated and ensure beautiful memories and moments for everyone to reflect on.

The journey is a unique and special experience that creates lasting relationships between the surrogate, the intended parents, and close friends or family members. Enjoying each moment of this incredible experience makes it all worth it in the end.

Show Your Love

When your friend or family member returns home after giving birth, she'll need rest and relaxation. You can show your love through simple gestures. Something as simple as cooking their favorite meal or giving them a heartfelt card while they let their body heal can make a big impact.

Learn More About Surrogacy

Supporting your friend or family member who is a surrogate mother during pregnancy is invaluable. The little things you do, like cooking dinner for her one night or taking her to her doctor's appointments, will be appreciated. But so will the bigger things, like being there to talk through any concerns she has or lending an ear when she just needs to vent.

If you have questions about surrogacy please reach out and call us – we would be happy to help in any way we can. Knowing they have your support will be incredibly reassuring for your loved one embarking on this journey.